Ino Sakura saga manga (on pause)

My friends I'm officially putting my manga on pause. My reasons for this is because deep deep down in my heart it think Im ready to create my manga but when I start drawing pages I feel as if I'm not good enough and it's killing me because my whole room is surrounded by manga,and anime art, books, and games even toys. and when I see others art it makes mine look like trash just look at my first pages






I made plenty of mistakes within those few panels and it's upsetting. I want to be better than Akira Toriyama,Masashi Kishimoto, Kazuki Takahashi, Rumoniko Takahashi but I'm not good enough yet! And it hurts so bad I can't think right. But my manga is all I have left to fall back on because I don't have a plan b, my high school dropped me last December, I hate were I stay at but I have no choice because I mother died in 2008-09, I have no support, people hate me because I'm different, and I'm a inside child. Tbh I don't know what to do I'm pushing my self every single day but because I don't sleep at night I'm always drained..... I don't know I feel hurt because I want my manga to make it big so I could move my family from this place. My familia forced me to go to a school where i couldn't learn and now they want me to go back to school the school where I failed art . Just don't lose faith in me, well that's ur option but I will come back ten times stronger I promise